By Atom Monk
Campaign Hawaii by Rick Tsujimura is possibly the worst book written since Neil Abercrombie’s Blood of Patriots.
As a writer, Tsujimura, should stick to the backroom shenanigans of a Democrat insider where he truly excels. His prose style can best be described as lawyerly, ponderous and sleep-inducing.
Tsujimura meticulously footnotes various sources that were biased op-ed bullshit the day they were published. Presenting them as settled fact today will not make them smell any better.
Tucked between the stupefying platitudes are nuggets of stunningly pompous self-congratulatory twaddle. This is another in a long line of “Democrat good…Republican bad” opuscules churned out by party apparatchiks who can’t bend over far enough for the totalitarian regime that has lorded over Hawaii for over 50 years.
Tsujimura repeatedly conjures up the metaphor of “sparrows” to portray the loyal, faceless, humble worker bees of Democrat grassroots campaigns. Anybody who has ever eaten outdoors at a McDonalds knows that sparrows are flying rats hell bent on stealing your food. They will also gleefully shit on your table. Tsujimura judiciously omits the parts where his noble “sparrows” stayed up all night running fax machines in order to slander their political enemies or when they launched massive defamatory whispering/chirping campaigns.
If you like to wallow in sanctimonious manure about imaginary moral superiority (coming from a lawyer) you may find merit with this onerous snooze fest. If you like to endure the gushing deification of garden-variety political operatives this outright corruption of history will be a delight.
The most unforgivable aspect of this unfortunate literary black hole is that it is relentlessly boring and unreadable. Take for example this turn of snappy prose:
“Because of the possibility of revenue shortfalls, I recommended that budget and service cutback contingencies be put in place.”
Or, this revelatory maxim about a winning political strategy:
“We often spread our sign holders about five to six feet apart, although ten feet is really preferable, because of the angle of sight as people drive by…”
Do yourself a favor and buy a good bottle of wine at Costco rather than waste the outrageous $17 for this paperback propaganda leaflet.
We rate this book: no votes